Rancho Texas Lanzarote Park - Part II

Rancho Texas Lanzarote Park - Part I

Helicopter Flight Lanzarote

Vilamoura, Algarve, Portugal - February 2016

Day 1 Mon 1st Feb

This is now my third holiday abroad in three months. It’s getting easier but was tough this morning because of the early start.  I got up at 3:30am, arrived at the airport at 5am and was in the lounge bar for 5:30am. A tough morning indeed made better with a couple of beers to kick off the day.

I was once again enticed by the wonderful in-flight food on offer and had the meal deal bacon Panini, sour cream Pringles and a small bottle of wine. The flight wasn’t too bad and I learned a bit about Portugal’s wild life. The couple next to me were avid bird watchers and had come to the Algarve for this very purpose. The lady did 90 percent of the talking, not uncommon amongst couples while the husband slept through most of the flight. He was obviously a seasoned traveller.

Rio Apartments, Vilamoura

At the airport, a private car took me to the Rio apartments and I was met by a lovely girl at reception. I checked in, sorted out a safe deposit box and sat on the balcony enjoying the warm morning sunshine. I later went for a walk to look for a local shop for milk and bread. There were no shops open in the area near to the apartments so I ventured a little further after a beer in a local bar.

I walked around Vilamoura marina admiring the boats before taking a well earned rest in Figo, a restaurant I would later spend many happy hours in. Today, I was introduced to Ray and Steve ‘the hat’, two amazing guys that I spent much of my time with on holiday and now consider as good friends. We chatted for a bit and spoke with a couple that were drinking Sangria. This is not something I would normally drink but the couple insisted I try some. Being sociable, I took a trial sip and then ordered a jug before I had finished the glass. It was very nice. After a few glasses, we ordered lunch, prawn salad with lettuce, carrots, peaches and pineapple. The prawns had been freshly caught that morning and were delicious and a great accompaniment to the Sangria.

Figo Restaurant, Vilamoura Marina

After lunch we went to Spot, a sports bar nearby. I had Guinness, Jonathan, Ray and Steve had beers and Jonathan’s girlfriend Irene had a cocktail. I’m not sure how long we stayed there but long enough to have a few more drinks. Later on that evening, Steve tripped on his way to the toilet and cut his head just above the eye. I had memories of Tenerife but we didn’t let that happen and managed to get him back to his apartment. Once he was settled and appeared to be OK, I got a taxi back to my apartment. It was a great start to the holiday and I was already feeling relaxed.

Day 2 Tues 2nd Feb

I was up at 8am and looking forward to another sunny day. I wasn’t disappointed because it was another great day. There was no bottled water so I boiled tap water in the kettle before drinking it. I then shaved and showered and went out looking for a restaurant offering a good healthy breakfast. I found a restaurant that did all day breakfasts and ordered a full English breakfast. Including tea, it was only 5 Euros. The day was getting better except for the poor exchange rate I got later, only 1.2 Euros to the £1. After changing some money, I went to the supermarket and bought a few essentials. One bottle of vodka, 6 bottles of San Miguel, 2 bottles of Coke, 2 bottles of orange juice, water, eggs, milk, bread, fairy liquid and a lighter because it's a gas cooker in the apartment and I couldn’t cook without one.

When I had finished shopping, one of the staff ordered a taxi to take me back to the apartment. The taxi driver was a real gentleman and helped with my shopping.  Once back in the apartment, I chilled out with vodka and orange and a good book on the balcony. I later went to reception, checked the WiFi was good to go and I had a brief chat with Deb on Facebook. At this time Deb was only a friend but our relationship has changed since then. Once that was done, I got changed and headed into town. This time I took a different route and lost my way slightly so I arrived about 40 minutes late. Not to worry, it wasn’t a blind date but a date with my new buddies Ray and Steve.

When I finally arrived around 2:40pm, they did give me a bit of earache for being late but a cold beer soon removed any thoughts of when, how or why. I was then introduced to Sophia, her full name being Fernanda Sophia Castro, a masseuse and reflexologist. Not a subject that I’m too familiar with but she did look to have all the professional requirements. I won’t say anymore here. We had a few beers and then left and went to Spot. 

Spot Pub, Vilamoura

In Spot we had a few more beers then ordered some food. The usual chef wasn’t in and one of the bar staff, a pretty girl with nice hips, made us Angus burgers. They weren’t good. They were cooked too quickly and looked partly raw. We would have complained if she wasn’t so attractive and attentive. But she was, so we didn’t, we ate. Ray left to meet one of his many girlfriends while Steve and I stayed a bit longer and had a few more beers. We left Spot and walked back to the marina. On the way there, we were offered drugs by what I can only describe as a man in distress but being good boys, we declined the offer. 

We went to Figo and I had a vodka and fresh orange while Steve had a double tomato juice. Memories of last night may have been his main reason for drinking vegetable juice. You are thinking ‘fruit juice’ but that’s what search engines are for. I felt a bit tipsy and told the waitress to have a drink on us but was a bit taken aback when she asked for 17.5 Euros to pay for it. When it costs an average of 4 Euros for a beer, it does ask the question WTF did she have to drink. Anyway, I paid for her drink with a smile and graciously left the establishment and took a taxi back to my apartment.

Day 3 Wed 3rd Feb

I was up at 8am and had tea and toast. I checked Facebook about 9:30am in reception and had a chat with Deb. Around 11am I had eggs on toast then went to the Tivoli bar at end of the street for a well deserved beer. Eating is thirsty work.

After a couple of beers, I took a short walk around the area and met a couple who had rented an apartment directly across from the Rio. They rented it for a year with the possibility of later moving to the Algarve permanently. We chatted for a bit about the weather, the advantages of living abroad and their plans for the future. It was a really interesting conversation considering that we were complete strangers. Anyway, time moved on and I left them and went back to my apartment. I had pasta for tea, read a book, watched a film and chatted with Deb on Facebook for a bit before turning in for the night.

Day 4 Thu 4th Feb

I got up at 8am, shaved and showered and had some cereal and coffee.  It was a beautiful sunny day so I sat on the balcony until 1:30pm enjoying the sunshine. I later went for a walk into town and had some lunch and a couple of beers in Figo. I then went to an Irish pub called O'shea's and had a pint of Guinness before heading back to the apartment. 

I got back about 5:30pm, had a beer and a few vodkas and listened to some music. I then spent some time on Facebook with Deb until 10:30pm. There were some WiFi issues at the apartment so I gave Deb my mobile number in case it crashed completely. I sent her a text at 9:46pm to check that she had the number.  However, keep in mind that Deb lives in Australia and I am in Portugal with a time difference of 11 hours. She received my text at 8:46am on Friday. Confused? I was to. For completeness here is a copy of our texts exactly as they were typed including spelling and grammatical errors.

Me – Hello

Deb – Hi back at ya

Me – I’ve given up a drink and a dance for a cup of tea and a book. It must be an age thing. Sent from my iRon 3 (removes the creases you never knew you had)

Deb – Lol sleep well I’ve done my bit of shopping now just chilling watching home and away yes I pre program them to tape while at work so I never miss an episode stay safe xx

Me – I can just about bear home and away. It’s the neighbours theme I can’t abide. lol Remember to check out the Wentworth prison series. It’s well worth a watch. Prisoner cell block H on steroids. Sleep tight xx

Deb – I will xx

I then read a book for a bit before going to bed.

Day 5 Fri 5th Feb

I woke up around 8am and had cereal and a cup of coffee.  Deb messaged me at 8:50am. Here is our conversation

Deb – Hey good morning. If you are asleep hope this doesn’t wake you. I checked out my phone plan and it does include 300 dollars worth of international calls texts for free for the months!!!! Wow I never knew that, have a nice day, don’t get to drunk lol

Me – Good evening. That’s good news. Unfortunately I’m no longer in a contract. I’m on pay as you go and it costs me 50p per text message. L I’ll check on FB later. I think Whatsapp may be free but will need to wait until I get home to check it.

Deb – OK, I downloaded whatsapp to and set it up, I will check FB later then

I checked my emails and chatted on Facebook from 10:30am until after 11am and then went back to my apartment and had eggs on toast for lunch. I took a walk into town and met Ray and Steve at Figo around 2pm. To start the day off Ray, Steve and I all had large glasses of tomato juice with pepper, Worcester sauce, lemon and ice. A group of golfers arrived a short time later. They were all drunk and it was doubtful if they would see a golf course tomorrow. 

O'shea's Irish Pub, Vilamoura

We left Figo and went to O'shea's for a well deserved Guinness and had a chat with the golfers and the girls that had flown over from London with them. We then left and went back to Figo for a couple of beers. We then had roast chicken and chips and a couple more beers. We later met three guys that had sailed from Marbella and were carrying out some repairs on their boat in Vilamoura. One of the guys called Mick was really drunk and kept kissing my hand. He wasn’t gay, at least I don’t think so just very drunk. We all had a few more beers except for Mick. He was really struggling now.  

One thing that stuck in my mind was that I accidently spilled some beer over Ray but while I was laughing, Mick spilled a complete pint all over me. That wasn’t quite so funny because I was absolutely soaked and it looked as if I’d wet myself. It was all good fun though. Eventually we had to take Mick back to the boat because he could no longer stand up or even sit up straight for that matter.

Once he was safely on board, we went to another Irish pub and had a few more beers. I had a good chat with Matt who was the main pilot of the boat and he told me a bit about their work and lifestyle. They salvaged sunken boats and either repaired them or sold the salvageable parts. After repairing the boat they had come in from Marbella, they were taking it to Brazil to sell. I was tempted to go with them but made what I think is a sensible decision not to. At the end of the day, they were strangers and I knew nothing about them. I could have finished up as shark bait or worse.

After a few more beers, I was up dancing but it gets a bit hazy after this. I remember dancing with a girl in pink and have no recollection of leaving the bar with her but was told by Ray the following day that I did leave with her and that she came back about an hour later. 

I vaguely remember getting a taxi but when I was dropped off at the apartment I was unable to pay because I didn’t have any money. Not one cent.  I can't remember what was said but the driver wasn't happy. My wallet was completely empty. It was a bit surprising since there was about 150 Euros and 100 pounds sterling in it earlier. Looking back, I can guess what happened. I‘m sure you can too.

Day 6 Sat 6th Feb

I woke up about 9:45am but still felt a bit drunk. Yesterday had been a good day but an expensive one. Fortunately I don’t carry every egg in the same basket. Speaking of which, I had some scrambled eggs on toast and pottered aimlessly about for a bit before chatting with Deb on Facebook around noon.

I then took a walk into town and met up with Ray and Steve in Figo. I had two pints of tomato juice and a beer that I couldn’t finish. I guess we all have our limits. The weather turned a bit chilly and with only a t-shirt on, I was feeling rather cold so I popped into a nearby shop and bought a cardigan. We watched the Liverpool V Sunderland match which ended in a 2-2 draw. I had an all day breakfast of which I only ate half. I wasn’t feeling great so I left 20 Euros for the drinks and eats with Ray and Steve and took a taxi back to the apartment. 

I read a book until 7:30pm then checked my emails and chatted with on Facebook until 8pm. I went to bed about 11pm and read a book until 12. I had a sore throat and was coughing throughout the night. It looked like I had caught a bug from Steve. He had been coughing quite a bit on the first day I had met him but I had assumed since he smoked that it was only a smokers’ cough. Another assumption I got badly wrong.

Day 7 Sun 7th Feb

I was up at 8am and had tea and scrambled eggs. I checked my emails and chatted on Facebook around 9:45am. Almost immediately after I had logged off the internet, a young lady started talking to me. Her name was Sandy and she had just arrived at the Rio apartments. After a chat we decided to meet up later and at 11am we went for a walk around the area. We walked past the Hilton and took a scenic route to the marina and she took a photo of me lying on some sort of stone sculpture in one of the parks. On the way to the marina we stopped off at a Tapas bar and had a light meal .We had soup with bread, olives, goat’s cheese and balsamic vinegar. This is not something I would have normally ordered but was pleasantly surprised that it tasted really good. I had a beer and Sandy had a coffee and a coke. We left and took a walk along the marina and looked at the boats and she took a picture of me standing next to the mariner statue in the marina. I guess she liked to take photos.

Once a year, there is a big carnival in the town of Quarteira which is only a short distance from Vilamoura. The streets during the carnival are packed with local residents, the majority of whom are Portuguese. We decided to go and watch it and as luck would have it, we found another tapas bar on

Carnival in Quarteira

route. I had a beer and Sandy had a coffee. We walked along the main street and watched the carnival for a bit before finding another tapas bar where I had a beer and Sandy had a coffee. There was also a group of bikers that were part of the carnival that added a bit of glamour to it. All in all it was a good day. The sun was shining and the beer was cold. After spending a few hours watching the carnival we headed back to the marina. Most of the shops were closed because it was Sunday but we did find another tapas bar on the way back. I had a beer and Sandy had a coffee. Have you noticed a pattern here?

We got back to our apartments about 5:30pm and agreed to meet later. She asked me to come to her apartment around 7pm and we would take it from there. I went to her apartment about 7:15pm and we were in the Rio bar or 7:30pm. We played pool then met another couple, Roger and Jill, and we chatted for ages. During that time I drank 8 vodkas and Sandy drank 5. The vodkas were too strong for her and she had to have a bigger glass with more coke so it took her longer to drink it. I must admit, they were large measures. We left the bar some time later and I went back to my apartment, picked up a bottle of Smirnoff and then went to Sandy’s apartment where we sat on the balcony and had a few drinks.

Whether it was the cool night air or there was some other reason I’m not sure but I coughed and coughed. I explained to Sandy that I might have picked up a bug from Steve since it was only yesterday that I developed a sore throat and started coughing. It was then she told me that she had a serious lung condition and couldn’t afford to catch anything like that and asked me to leave. I was a bit taken aback but totally understood the situation. I left and went back to my apartment. 

Day 8 Mon 8th Feb

I got up from bed about 9:45am and washed some of my clothes. I then went to Sandy's apartment about 10:45am to see how she was feeling. She looked rough, hung-over and very tired. She said she would see me later and blew me a kiss. At least that way she wouldn’t catch anything.

I met up with Ray and Steve at the Family Golf Park in the afternoon and had a round of mini golf.

Family Golf Park, Vilamoura

The Family Golf Park in Vilamoura boasts a large leisure and entertainment area with two 18-hole mini golf courses, the biggest in Europe. It also has a nice cafe area where you can have a light snack, tea, coffee, soft drinks or something stronger. We had a coffee before our game and a beer afterwards, with the loser paying for the beers. This time there were two losers which meant two beers. Ray won with a score of 50 while Steve and I managed a close but not good enough 52.

We later took a walk into the marina and had a beer at Figo and chatted with the staff there for a bit. After this, we then took another walk into town where we found Grogan’s pub. This is an Irish sports bar that specializes in British cuisine and very good it is too. Steve and I had fish and chips with bread and butter and Ray had sausages and mash. The food was delicious.

After a couple of beers we left and walked around town checking out the location of apartments in the area to see which were best suited for a return trip in May. We then went back to Figo where Steve and I had a pint of tomato juice and Ray had a coffee. I left them there and walked back to the apartment getting back around 6pm. I went online for a bit checking emails and chatting on Facebook until 7:30pm. I had an early night.

Day 9 Tue 9th Feb

I was up at 8am, had a coffee and read a book for a bit. I shaved and showered and then checked my emails and chatted on Facebook until 11am. I received a text from Ray telling me that they went out last night but didn't get back until 5:30 this morning and will text me later. Not long after that I received another text from Ray asking me to meet up with him and Steve at Figo about 2:30pm.

It was raining so I had a beer in the Tivoli bar and the landlady ordered a taxi for me. When I arrived at Figo, Steve and Ray were drinking tomato juice. I thought to myself “I don’t think so” and ordered
three beers. When we had finished we left and went to Grogan's Pub. I had sausage, onions and mash. Ray had chicken and mushroom pie and Steve had liver and bacon. Of course, we all had the obligatory beers to wash it down.

Grogan's Pub, Vilamoura

After leaving Grogan’s we took a walk into town and found a pharmacy where I managed to get something to ease my sore throat and my annoying cough. The Pharmacist recommended Mucosolvan and told me to take one capsule each day with a large glass of water and if symptoms persisted after 4 days, advised that I see a doctor.

We left the pharmacist and went to an Irish pub called O'shea’s. For Ireland being such a small country, the Irish sure get around. They are almost as ubiquitous as the Scots. I had 2 pints of Guinness while Ray and Steve had 2 small beers. They were definitely struggling after last night so it was time to quit while they were ahead. They walked me to the taxi rank where I got a taxi back to my apartment. They walked back to their apartment which was much closer to the marina than mine. Anyway, they needed the walk.

When I arrived back at the Rio apartments, I met a couple in the reception area that I had spoken with the night before when I was with Sandy. The couple’s female representative asked where my wife was today. She had obviously got a hold of the wrong end of the stick and I explained to her that we weren’t married but had just met. Although she was very nosey she wasn’t very sharp. Lack of sharpness and nosiness are traits that commonly go hand in hand often accentuated by moaning noises. Don’t get excited, the moaning noises are usually about other people. The male representative of the pair wasn’t any better. Tennis balls have sharper edges than he did. Maybe he used to play. I said that I would catch up with them later but to be honest, I really hoped that I didn’t.

I escaped to my apartment and later checked my email and chatted on Facebook for a bit. I went down to bar about 10pm and met up with Roger who I’d spoken with on Sunday night. We talked about all sorts of things. Everything from his 20 year marriage to what the weather was like back in the UK. Miserable is what you are thinking but that’s not true. We had a fun night with lots of laughter. I’m not sure at what time we left the bar but I would guess it was around 2am. When I got back to my apartment I was in the mood for dancing and dancing is what I did until around 5am when I collapsed on the bed.

Day 10 Wed 10th Feb

I woke about 9:30am and had coffee and some soup. I thought I had something stuck in my throat but it was my tonsils that were swollen. It could be related to the capsules I got from the pharmacist since I took two yesterday instead of one. Doubling up on the medication perhaps wasn't wise. The swelling went down a bit by lunch time but I decided to wait until later tonight before taking another capsule.

I went to the Tivoli bar at 2pm, had a beer then got a taxi into town to meet Ray and Steve at Figo. We were going to walk around the marina but the weather took a turn for the worst and it rained heavily so we stayed in Figo had a few beers. We had soup and bread rolls accompanied by another beer. Steve and I had chicken and chips while Ray had pork medallions in mushroom sauce. We left Figo shortly after 6pm. I took a taxi back to my apartment, read a book for a bit then checked my emails and chatted on Facebook until 8pm. I then watched a film and checked Facebook again around 10:30pm. I went to bed about 12 and read for a bit. I coughed most of the night and got very little sleep.

Day 11 Thu 11th Feb

I was up at 9:30am and had a cup of coffee and some cheese. I tidied up the apartment and then got ready to meet Ray (Dad) and Steve in the Family Golf Park at 12:30. The reason I put Dad in brackets after Ray’s name is because that was his nickname. He was a bit older than Steve and I and we called him Dad not because of the age difference but because he looked after Steve and helped him out financially on occasion. We had a coffee in the Family Golf Park cafe then played a round on the harder of the two courses. This time Steve won and I was last, so I bought the beers. After the beer, we took a walk around the marina before going to Figo where we had three more beers. We left Figo and went to Grogan's for some food. We all had soup and a beer to start before ordering the main course. I had fish, mashed potatoes and mushy peas. Ray had sausage, onions and mashed potatoes, and Steve had Pork chops and mashed potatoes. Only the potatoes were mashed today.

We left Grogan’s and went back to our respective apartments. They walked and I took a taxi since I was further away. If I do decide to go back to Vilamoura, I will make sure that I get an apartment or hotel nearer the town.

After being dropped off at the Rio apartments, a lady in the reception area asked me when the reception desk was open. I told her it varied and that there were no set times for opening. She had just arrived but there was nobody to meet her here. I went to the restaurant bar to make some enquiries and spoke with the manager but he told me that the apartments were separate from the restaurant and bar. I thanked him and told him I would sort it out. I went back to reception and told the lady what was said. She was obviously a seasoned traveller because she didn’t seem disturbed at all when I told her. Eventually I found a number to call. Since the lady in question didn’t have a phone, I called and explained the situation to the recipient on the other end of the phone and was told there would be someone on their way soon.  During this time another woman in the reception area said Hi to me. I returned the reply but didn't recognise it was Sandy at that particular time. She was reading and wearing glasses. I only noticed it was her when I left the other woman to go to my apartment. I spoke briefly with Sandy once I had recognised her. She said she was going out but I never asked where. She also said that she would be glad to go back home because there was nothing here for her. I won’t comment on that.

Rio Restaurant and Bar, Vilamoura

After showering and changing I went down to the bar. Sandy was playing pool with another couple so I assumed she must have decided not to go out. I ordered a beer and noticed Roger who I chatted with the other night was sitting at the bar. He ordered a whisky but didn't have enough money with him to pay for it. I think his wife was holding the purse strings so I did what any empathetic person would do and bought it for him. I ordered a vodka and coke for myself and we chatted for a bit. Roger said he would go upstairs, get some money and be back in 2 minutes. He came back about 15 minutes later with his wife Jill. I had just ordered another vodka and coke by this time so I bought them both a drink.

Sandy came to the bar and ordered a coffee. She wasn’t in our company and paid for her own. She then went outside with Jill for a cigarette while Roger and I chatted at the bar. When Sandy and Jill came back in, Roger and Sandy seemed to have a disagreement. I have no idea what it was about but they argued back and forth until eventually Sandy stormed out of the bar. I was now beginning to feel that I had a lucky escape. A cough and a sore throat I can deal with.

Jill, Roger and me had a few drinks together and a good old chinwag. What a lovely couple. We laughed a lot. I’ve no idea what we laughed about but we had a great night. Once we had left the bar, I went back to my apartment and took my laptop along to the end of the corridor as usual so that I could connect to the WiFi. I chatted with Deb for a bit on Facebook then went back to my apartment. I had a cup of tea then went to bed and read for a bit. My cough was not as bad as last night but still annoying and I did manage to get a better sleep.

Day 12 Fri 12th Feb

I was up 9am and it only dawned on me this morning that it was Sandy's birthday yesterday. If I had remembered, I would have at least wished her a happy birthday last night although I’m not sure that would have brightened her mood. 

I had some breakfast, shaved and showered and checked my emails and chatted on Facebook. I later met Ray in town and then went to Chico's to meet Steve and Sao. The relationship between Steve and Sao is complicated but Ray and I were hoping to find some sort of resolution. To put you in the picture, Sao is a waitress in Figo and it was her day off. Steve knew Sao from previous visits to Vilamoura but things weren’t working out so well for them. Steve was hoping to go back to his apartment with Sao and share a bottle of wine but Sao would have none of it. 

When I said that I should leave them to it, Sao told me that if I did then she wouldn’t talk to me again. I stayed but knew then that any relationship that Steve had with Sao was now over. When we eventually left Chico’s, Sao went back to Figo, while Ray, Steve and I went to an Irish bar and had a few more beers. When in doubt, drink it out. We then went to Grogan's. I had a pint of Guinness complimented with fish and chips. Ray had a Cornish pasty and Steve had steak pie with all the trimmings including beer.

Once we had our fill, we left and went for a walk into town. I later changed some sterling into Euros and got a taxi back to my apartment. When you run out of Euros in the Algarve, changing sterling to Euros is like changing water into wine.

We all agreed to meet later tonight and Ray said he would text me around 10pm and we could meet in the Irish bar that we knew so well. When I got back to my apartment around 6:30pm I checked my emails and chatted on Facebook with Deb for a bit.

Ray sent me a text at 9pm to let me know that Steve would be in the Irish bar between 10:30pm and 10:45pm. I had some time to kill so I went down to the Rio bar. Roger and Jill were outside smoking and talking with the lady I helped the other day in reception, I now know her as Mary. Jill told me to get myself a drink and come and join them. I got a vodka and coke at the bar and went back outside to talk with them. When I got outside it looked like Roger and Jill were trying to get me and Mary together. I explained that I was meeting someone later but maybe we could get together tomorrow night.

We had a couple of drinks together before I called a taxi to take me into town. I arrived at the Irish bar about 10:40pm. Steve hadn't arrived so I bought myself a beer and familiarised myself with the surroundings. I’d been here before, déjà vu. Steve arrived about 11pm and we had a beer together. We talked with two girls, one of whom I had met the night before. It didn’t register at the time but I found out later that one of them was with me when I lost my money. Is that so surprising?

Ray arrived about 11:45pm and bought a round. He introduced Joyce, a Brazilian girl with a stunning figure. I'm sure he knew all the working girls in Vilamoura. After a few more drinks, I bid farewell and got a taxi back to my apartment.

Day 13 Sat 13th Feb

I woke up around 8:30am, had a coffee and some scrambled eggs. I washed my socks and smalls and updated my diary. Is there anything more interesting? If you have watched paint dry, you will understand perfectly. Roger and Jill were leaving today so I popped along to their apartment to see them before they left to go back home. Jill told me that Roger was in the Tivoli bar but I was welcome to come in and have a drink with her. Not one to refuse an invitation, I did and we chatted for a bit. We agreed that I would meet them in the Tivoli bar later that day.

Tivoli Bar, Vilamoura

After shaving and showering, I got ready and headed down to the Tivoli. When I got there, Mary was with them. We all had a good chat and a few beers before walking into town. On route we stopped and had a beer in a tapas bar and then went to Chico's and had a couple more beers. Ray and Steve joined us later and we had a few more beers. After saying our goodbyes, Roger and Jill left and went back to their apartment just before 5pm. Their flight was at 8pm. We had a couple of fun nights together and it was a shame that they were not staying longer. However, I still keep in touch with them.

After they had gone, Ray went off to meet another one of his girlfriends. Mary, Steve and I went to an Irish pub and had a few more beers. Steve was very drunk and now out of it so Mary and I left him and went for something to eat. We had peppered fillet steaks with chips and salad and 2 bottles of wine in the Mayflower restaurant. The steaks were done to perfection and were absolutely delicious. If you ever visit Vilamoura, I can highly recommend this restaurant.

Mayflower Restaurant, Vilamoura

After our food, we got a taxi back to the Rio apartments and had a few drinks in the bar. When I got back to my apartment after leaving the bar, there was a parcel with a note outside the door. Jill had left me eggs, bacon, bread, milk, juice, beer and some other stuff. What a thoughtful lady. I knew that Mary didn’t have tea bags, milk or sugar so I went to Mary’s apartment to give them to her. At least she could have a cup of tea in the morning. She answered the door in her undies and came out into the corridor and started dancing. I raised my hands up and started laughing and told her we both had too much to drink and that I would see her in the morning. I left smiling and went back to my apartment.

Day 14 Sun 14th Feb

I was up at 9am and had orange juice, tea and toast and met up with Ray and Steve in Figo at lunch time. I had a coffee followed by a few beers. Ray left to meet Nicole, one of his girlfriends, while Steve and I went to Spot for another few beers and a bite to eat. After some interesting conversations and a few beers, I left Steve in Spot and got a taxi back to my apartment. I went to see Mary to make arrangements for tomorrow and then had an early night.

Day 15 Mon 15th Feb

I was up around 8am and had a light breakfast. I checked my emails and chatted on Facebook before sitting on the balcony enjoying a glass of fruit juice.

Around 1pm Mary and I met in the Tivoli bar and we had a couple of beers and chatted with Marcus, the owner of the bar. We then left and took a walk down to the marina where we found another Irish bar called The Brewery and had a few beers. It was a really sunny day and we had a great position in the bar to take advantage of the sunshine. 

We later went to Figo and had a 2 litre jug of Sangria. It hit the spot and we stayed in Figo until the sun went down. After this, we went to the supermarket so that Mary could get some shopping done and then took a taxi back to the Rio and went to her apartment. I brought some beer and vodka to compliment her red wine. We both got legless. 

Mary then said that I couldn’t spend the last night on my own and asked me to bring all my belongings from my apartment to hers so that we could spend the last night together. It must have taken me longer than I thought to pack my case because she appeared at my door in her dressing gown. She thought I had fallen asleep. Anyway, I finished packing and brought everything down to her apartment. 

We sat on the balcony and had a few more drinks and did a fair bit of talking before going to bed. We slept in separate beds and both of us managed to get a good sleep. I didn’t think she snored too loudly.

Day 16 Tue 16th Feb

I got up at 7am and Mary made the coffee while I washed and shaved. After drinking the coffee I had a shower then got dressed. We said our goodbyes and I left. I dropped off my apartment and safe key in reception but was disappointed that no one was there to refund my deposit for the safe key.  

The transfer bus arrived for me at 7:50am but this was too early. It arrived at Faro airport at 8:20am but we couldn't check in until 9am. Several of the other passengers were annoyed about this and I’m sure some will complain to the holiday company.

It was a good flight back to Manchester. I was seated in 31A and had all three seats to myself. It was a perfect ending to a great holiday.

Bugibba, Malta - January 2016

Day 1 Fri 1st Jan

I arrived at Manchester airport about 4pm. It was very quiet with only three flights leaving from terminal two. The check-in girl offered me extra legroom seats at no extra cost. Of course, I accepted this offer graciously but wondered why I was given the option. It later transpired that the plane was under capacity and as well as extra legroom, the adjacent seats to me were empty and many of the rows in front and behind were empty. 

I had a one beer in the airport lounge and a snack and a bottle of water on the plane. From my earlier experience in Tenerife, I thought a little sobriety was sensible. But, I couldn't resist a bargain meal deal. For only 7 Euros, I had a miniature of vodka, a small can of coke and a packet of plain slightly sea salted crisps. It always amazes me how cheap the on board prices are. 

I must admit it was an enjoyable flight and with no screaming kids and extra lie down room, it was a gentle massage of the senses rather than the usual assault.

After 3 hours, we touched down at Malta International Airport at around 10:30pm. The transfer went smoothly and I arrived at the Blue Sea Bugibba hotel about 12:15am. 

At reception, I asked for a room on the top floor but didn’t expect to need directions on how to get there. Fortunately, there was a gentleman resident who was really helpful and took me all the way to my room. He showed me how to use the air conditioning and even tuned in the TV. What a great start to the holiday. To get an idea of where my room was located in relation to the front desk of the hotel here are the directions.

Pool in the Blue Sea Bugibba hotel

Leave reception on the 3rd floor, take the corridor to right of reception, walk to the end of the corridor, turn right, take lift on RHS to the 1st floor, turn right then turn left, follow the corridor to the door that opens onto the pool area, cross the pool area to other side, take the RHS and walk up a small ramp then turn right, go up several stairs, take the lift on LHS to 4th floor, turn left and continue to the end of the corridor and my room 441 was the last room on the RHS. 

I unpacked and navigated my way to reception to enquire about a safe deposit box since there was none in the room. I also asked if the hotel bar was open. I got a safe deposit box but unfortunately the bar was closed. I was surprised at this since it was only about 1am.

Not one to be beaten, I went for a walk and found a bar just around the corner from the hotel. It was called the Babylon Club. It looked a bit dark and dingy but this was probably because of the subdued lighting and my first impressions of it being seedy appeared to be unfounded. The bar staff were pleasant but the only complaint I had was that there was no draught beer. I had two cans of the local Cift lager but felt at 3.50 Euros a can, a bit overpriced. I went back to the hotel a short time later and was in bed for 2:30am

Day 2 Sat 2nd Jan

After a good sleep, I was up at 8:30am and in the dining room for breakfast at 9:30am. It was a buffet breakfast with a good selection of cold meats and cheeses. There was cereal, bread and bread rolls, apples and oranges, olives and a few other things I didn’t recognise. There was also bacon, boiled and scrambled eggs, tomatoes and frankfurters and a few other things I’ve missed here. There was a selection of cold juices, a coffee machine for making espresso, cappuccino or plain coffee if you preferred, and of course tea.

After a good breakfast, I went to the bar and had a few vodkas and fresh orange. It’s important to keep a good level of vitamin C in the body especially during the winter months. I left the bar about 1:30pm and went to the dining room for lunch. It was a buffet but I can’t remember what was available other than the soup. The soup was very tasty.

A half hour later I was back in the bar socialising with some of the other residents and topping up my vitamin C level. I left the bar around 5pm and got freshened up and changed for dinner at 6:30pm. I’ve no idea what I had to eat other than the soup. The soup was good.


I was back in the bar for 7pm. Things got a bit hazy after that. I can remember chatting with my new found friends and have a vague recollection of dancing on the small stage that was in the bar.
My one weakness after a few drinks is dancing. Some people sleep, I dance. I’ve came to the conclusion it’s in the genes since my great grandmother was French and a dancer in the Folies Bergère in Paris. That’s my excuse and I’m sticking to it. Anyway, it must have been a good night since I remember little about it.

Day 3 Sun 3rd Jan

I didn’t feel so good this morning. I had a vitamin C overload so I gave breakfast a miss. I wandered down to the bar about 11:30am and had a vodka and fresh orange. I felt better after a vitamin hit. I didn’t want to make the same mistake as yesterday so I visited the car museum. It was an interesting place with some great classic cars. I put a video up on YouTube that you can watch if you like your cars. It is The Malta Classic Car Museum

After leaving the car museum, I took a short walk along the promenade and was back for lunch at 1:30pm. I tried the pasta but couldn’t eat it. I tried the sausage meat but couldn’t eat that either so I settled for the soup. The soup was good.

I was back in the bar at 2pm and had some interesting conversations with the other residents in the bar. We talked about everything from the weather to the spin speeds on washing machines. I’ve always been amazed at what people become passionate about after a few drinks.

I met a lady from Cumbernauld in Scotland who was not happy with the hotel. She didn’t like her room or the food. In fact, there wasn’t much she did like. I’ve never been one to make judgements but the soup was good. How anybody could complain about it, beggars belief. She left the hotel and moved to a nearby apartment but regularly came to the hotel to talk about how bad our hotel was. I’m sure she had another agenda but that’s a story for another time. I had four large vodkas and fresh orange. The bar staff didn’t do small measures so if I make any further reference to vodka you can assume they were large ones.

I left the bar around 4pm and went for a nap. I’ve been told in the past that a nap is good for you. I can believe it although I draw the line at what’s sometimes referred to as ‘power naps’. Mental alertness has never been on my top holiday must dos. As a reader, you’re probably already aware of that.

I went for dinner around 6:30pm. I haven’t a clue what I ate but if I can’t remember, it must have been good. After the meal I had a drink in the hotel bar. All inclusive has advantages but the bar was empty so I headed out into the wider world. I found the Elvis tribute bar and had beer and a vodka to pay my tribute. There weren’t many Elvis supporters tonight so I headed back to the hotel.

On the way back to the hotel, I heard some great music from a nearby bar. It was like a worm to a fish. I had to investigate. The bar is called Munchies and not to be confused with the Amsterdam equivalent. It only sold alcohol as far as I’m aware.

That night in Munchies I met Garry and Gina from Cumbernauld. I couldn’t believe it. Another two from Cumbernauld, a town I had stayed in for around ten years in an earlier life. To cut to the chase we hit it off and did a few flaming shots. Not normally my tipple but it would have been rude not to partake. We had a great night and I have photos to prove it. Some of them are already on YouTube. It’s good to share.

I don’t remember leaving Munchies but being less than 50 yards from my hotel, it was an easy route home.


Day 4 Mon 4th Jan 

I woke up this morning and couldn't find my glasses. After a futile search it dawned on me that they were in my jacket pocket. Unfortunately, I couldn’t find my jacket either. I must have been blind drunk last night and left my jacket in Munchies. After breakfast, I popped across the road to check if I had left it there. There was no sign of it so I asked one of the bar staff if anyone had handed it in. To my dismay, no one had.

Munchies Bar, Bugibba

I returned back to the hotel thinking that I would need to buy another jacket when one of the residents called me over. He told me that Garry had picked up my jacket after I had left Munchies. That was great news and Garry appeared shortly afterwards with it. After putting it in my room I came back down to reception and chatted with Gary for a bit. He told me that his sister Gina wasn’t feeling too well and would be staying in her room for the rest of the day.

Talking can be thirsty work so Gary and I made an executive decision and went into the bar for a cold beer. We had a few games of pool and few more cold beers. We missed lunch so we both had vodka and fresh orange to supplement the beer and boost our vitamin C levels. We got well boosted because we missed dinner as well.

We left the bar and moved into the seating area near reception and continued drinking. I do enjoy a comfy seat after a few. There were also a few other residents there including a lass from Newcastle who had lost her passport and had to stay for another week. I found out later that she was a pole dancer.  I’m not sure what time we left but it was early morning and I remember getting to my room only to find that I had no key and couldn’t open the door. I made my way back to reception and told one of the girls there of my plight. She couldn’t find another key, so one of the security staff came back with me and opened the room door for me. I was ready for bed.


Day 5 Tue 5th Jan

I had a hangover when I woke up this morning and missed breakfast and lunch. When I was getting dressed I found an email address in my pocket. I’m not certain but I think it was the email address of Marie from Cumbernauld. I never followed it up, so never did find out for sure.

I went to reception and asked for another key to my room but was told there was no spare key and that I would be given another room. Looking back it made sense not to have a spare key because anyone who found the key I had lost; they would have access to the room. If that person was unscrupulous, then who knows what the outcome could be. I believe they changed the lock but didn’t ask me for any money, only that I leave the key in reception before I went out.

The room I was given was in the main building above reception. I could understand the logic. However, there was no balcony. The original room I was in had a balcony overlooking the pool and I could take advantage of the early morning sunshine. The new room only had a window overlooking the courtyard. The upside was that it was a self catering apartment with a full size cooker and fridge. Since I was fully inclusive, I didn't use the cooker but the fridge was handy for keeping water and juice cool.

I had dinner at 6:30pm but without alcohol and bought some bottled water and juice from the local shop across the road. I went back to my room around 7:30pm, watched TV for an hour then read a book until 11pm before going to bed.

Day 6 Wed 6th Jan

Malta National Aquarium

I was still feeling rough but had breakfast at 8:30am. After breakfast I went to the Malta International Aquarium. I arrived before the official opening time and had a coffee in their bistro before entering the main aquarium area. There were some amazing displays of marine fish inside and there were touch screens beside the tanks that displayed information about the fish and their habitat. I bought some souvenirs in the shop and returned to the hotel about 12pm.

I had a coffee and a beer followed by lunch at 1pm. I hadn’t seen Garry or Gina since Monday and there was no one in the bar so I had one beer then went back to my room and watched TV. I had fish for dinner but it looked and tasted raw in parts.  After dinner, I went back to room for an hour and then went down to the bar.  I met Garry in the bar and he told me his sister wasn't well and he had to book a flight home for her and take her to the airport. 

We had a few beers and a few games of pool until about 10:30pm. We then left and went to Munchies to get some decent beer and vodka and fresh orange juice. The beer in the hotel was the local beer and not to Gary’s taste and they were now serving it in half pint glasses. Also, there was no fresh orange left in the hotel bar. We had a couple of beers and a couple of vodkas with fresh orange in Munchies and I left at 12pm and went back to my room. Gary stayed a bit longer.

Day 7 Thu 7th Jan

I didn’t feel great when I woke this morning.  I had the dreaded Delhi belly probably from eating the fish last night. I couldn’t face breakfast and had to sit down five or six times throughout the morning.

I went down to the bar at 12pm and had a beer. I sat outside for a bit because the sun was shining then went for a walk around town. I got back at 1:30pm or lunch then went back to my room and watched TV then read a book for a bit.

I had dinner at 6:30pm then went to the bar. There was still no fresh orange so I didn’t order anything else and went back to my room and watched the news. I got changed and went back down to the bar. There was no sign of Garry so I sat with a group of folks for most of the night and had a couple of beers and a few vodkas with cokes. The group finished and left the bar around 11:30pm since they were going on an early morning trip tomorrow. I left too but went to Munchies for a bit and had a few vodkas and fresh orange. I got back to my room around 12:30pm, another early night.

Day 8 Fri 8th Jan

I had breakfast at 8am and said my farewells to the few in the group that turned up for breakfast before their trip. I then had a lie down for an hour after breakfast then came back down, had a coffee and read my kindle for a bit outside.

I then went back to my room and got washed and changed before walking to the harbour to check the price of boat trips. I also watched some folk playing bowls. I had a couple of beers and a cheese toasty in a restaurant in the square called Miracles then it was back to the hotel for lunch at 1:30pm. I had soup and a slice of pizza with a beer then went back to my room for a well deserved nap. I watched a film then got ready for dinner at 6:30pm. I don’t recall what happened after that.

Day 9 Sat 9th Jan

I missed breakfast again and didn’t surface until 11:30am. I walked around town and did a bit of a pub crawl. I missed lunch but had dinner at 6:30pm. I watched TV until 8pm then went to Murphy’s Irish pub and listened to some live music. I had a beer in some other pub but can’t remember the name and once again finished up in Munchies until 2am.

Day 10 Sun 10th Jan

I missed breakfast and got up 11am and went for a walk around town. I enquired about boat trip to Gozo but was told to come back tomorrow because of a possible storm warning. I had two beers and a cheese and ham toasty in Miracles. There was a bikers’ convention in the square and there were some really nice bikes ranging from old Harleys to new Yamaha and BMWs. I headed back to the hotel for lunch, stopping in a shop to buy t-shirts on the way. 

After lunch I went out for a walk and had a beer in the Queen Victoria and a Guinness in Murphy’s bar. I returned to the hotel and had a beer in the bar. In the bar I met Rob from Plymouth who had just arrived on a 10 day break. He came on his own because his wife wanted to stay at home because of her condition. She had cancer in the face and neck and had recently undergone plastic surgery. He would have been happy to stay at home with his wife but it was her idea that he took a break.

Rob and I met later in the dining room and had dinner together. We had a couple of beers with dinner and a good old chat. I had another beer but took it back to my room about 8pm, watched a film and turned in early.

Day 11 Mon 11th Jan

I was up early and had breakfast at 8:30am. I booked the Malta Sightseeing hop on hop off bus for today at a cost of 20 Euros and a boat to Gozo for tomorrow for 40 Euros.

The Blue Grotto, Malta

It was a sunny day but windy and I hopped on the bus at 10:06am at main square across from the HSBC bank. I hopped off at the Blue Grotto, the Mdina main gate and Quil-Crafts village. I had two beers in the Blue Grotto, chatted with a restaurant owner and walked around the area and took some photos. I had a coffee in the Bacchus restaurant in Mdina and then took a stroll around admiring the architecture. In the Quil-Crafts village, I bought a t-shirt and some presents to bring back home and was back in the hotel for 5pm after the last hop on.

I had a beer in the bar and then went back to my room to sort a few things for my trip tomorrow. I was back downstairs for 6pm and had another beer before dinner. I met Rob in the dining room and we chatted over dinner. We had a couple of beers with dinner and I was back in my room for 8pm. I watched TV for a bit then came back down to the bar at 9:15pm. I spent most of the night chatting to the barman. He had some interesting stories to tell. One of them concerned his Thai wife who he had been married to for twelve years but was recently separated from. Others concerned happenings and incidents in Pattaya and Bangkok in Thailand but I can’t mention them here. I left at 11pm after a few more beers and was tucked up in bed by 11:30pm.

Day 12 Tue 12th Jan

Gozo

I got up at 7:30am and had breakfast at 8:15am. I was picked up by coach at 9am for the drive to Valetta. One of the other residents Derek Hocker also booked the Gozo trip so it was company for both of us. He also came on holiday to Malta on his own. He had a family but was divorced several years ago. He told me that he had been a postman for the last 15 years and a few other personal details. We chatted about a number of topics holidays, marriages, jobs, etc. 

After docking in Gozo, we took a coach to the capital and had lunch. After this we were taken to a nearby beach although it was too cold this time of year for a swim. We arrived back in Valetta about 4pm and back at the hotel for 5pm. Some photos of the trip can be seen at: 
A Boat Trip from Valetta to Gozo

Day 13 Wed 13th Jan

I was up early and had breakfast at 8am then went for a walk around town. When I arrived back in the hotel I met a couple from London who had recently arrived and a girl called Alison who was chatting with them.  After lunch, we went out and had a few drinks together. I found out then that Alison was a day trader, something I had looked at a number of years ago but didn’t because of a market crash. We ate out and had a few more drinks. Later we played a few games of pool and had another few drinks before rolling back to the hotel.

Day 14 Thu 14th Jan

I missed breakfast but went for a walk and bought a few last minute items and presents to take home. After lunch I met up with the couple from London and we hit the town. We missed dinner and never got back to the hotel until after 2am.

Day 15 Fri 15th Jan

Surprisingly I was up early and had breakfast at 8am. I collected my passport and money from the safe deposit box and handed back the safe key. I then packed my suitcase and went down to reception at 11am and said my goodbyes to several of the residents. I was picked up at 11:40am and taken to the airport. To soak up the booze, I bought a tuna and coleslaw baguette and a mug of tea in the airport lounge. During the flight I had no alcohol, only water and a snack.

I hope you didn’t find this blog too boring. I did much more than I’ve mentioned here but I can’t remember much of it and can’t mention some of it. Thank you for reading it.

Puerto de la Cruz, Tenerife - December 2015

This is the first holiday that I had after losing my wife in July 2015 and the first holiday I have ever taken on my own. I was feeling very depressed and booked it on impulse after a few beers. It was only the next day that I fully realised what I had done and thought that I had made a big mistake. However, it was paid for and there was no chance of a refund so I made the decision to go.

What follows is taken from a diary that I wrote during the holiday. I have never at any other time in my life done this. The only content I have ever written into any diary in the past was dentist or doctor appointments and family birthdays.

Day 1 Wed 2nd December

The flight time was 7:20am so I ordered a taxi to the airport for 5am since it takes less than twenty minutes to get to the airport from my home.

On arriving at the airport it felt strange being on my own and I seriously thought of returning back home. But I knew I had to continue with the holiday. Many people travel on their own and think nothing of it. My difficulty was that I had always travelled with someone, either family or friends.

The airport lounge was quiet at that time in the morning which made my sense of being on my own worse if anything. It was nothing like the holiday joy that I had experienced on previous holidays but I had to make the best of it. I had a beer in one of the airport bars to start the day. During the flight I had 4 vodkas with fresh orange. I believe it's important to get plenty of vitamin C especially during the winter months.

In the past, my wife always organised flight details and packing, etc. This being new to me, unfortunately, I didn't print off any documentation other than the boarding passes. This became a slight issue later but nothing that couldn't be resolved.

When I arrived at Tenerife South airport, I thought to myself where do I get the transfer bus to the hotel.

I looked around the terminal and finally spotted a Thompson rep who I approached and asked her where I got the transfer bus. She asked me for my transfer voucher but needless to say, I didn't have one. She then asked what company I booked it through. I told her I couldn't remember. I was thinking at this stage that maybe I should have had tea and not vodka.

She pointed to a desk at the far end of the airport but after I had almost reached it, I remembered booking through 'lowcost holidays' so I returned to tell her. After I spoke with her again she pointed me to another desk in the other direction. However, when I got to that desk, the staff there pointed me to the desk that the Thompson rep had pointed out in the first place. By this time I was feeling really warm and getting tired. I explained to the staff at this desk that I had no transfer voucher. After checking my name on their system, they gave me directions to the pickup bus. I found the bus and I was on my way! Well almost...

The bus was there but the driver was waiting for a flight from Germany to arrive. Until then there were only two couples and myself but the bus was almost completely filled when the Germans boarded. We left a few hours later than expected because of the transfer delays. During our trip, the bus was rocking from side to side. It did this for the whole duration rocking back and forth with more than one person complaining of sea sickness. I assume there was a problem with the suspension but all the driver said was that it wasn't his driving or his fault.

After around 90 minutes on the bus, it was my stop. Because of the steep hills and narrow roads I wasn't dropped off at the hotel but to be fair I was taken as close as possible by the driver. I had only to walk about 50 yards to the hotel entrance. On this journey I was the only passenger staying at the Casa del Sol.

Casa del Sol hotel

On arrival at reception, the desk clerk was dealing with someone and at no time did he acknowledge my presence until he had finished dealing with them. In the past I would have considered this as ignorant but if I've learned anything in the past few months, it has been that life is too short to get annoyed with actions like this. Anyway, I was on holiday and it only took about 10 minutes to deal with this customer. When the desk clerk did eventually attend to me, he was very courteous. He asked me for the hotel voucher to confirm my reservation. I explained that I didn't print it off but could provide him with a reference number from an email. He said it didn't matter and after checking my passport, gave me the card for entry to my room and directions on how to get there.

My first impressions of the room were good. It was clean and tidy and of reasonable size for a studio. There were two single beds, a small cooking area, and wardrobe with safe, two chairs and a writing desk with a mirror. There was also a small portable TV. The bathroom was a good size and had both a bath and a shower. The balcony was also of a good size with a table and two chairs as well as a drying rack. The view from my balcony was breathtaking. There was a sea view to the left, with houses and hotels in the centre and a mountain view to the right.

On closer inspection however, things were not so rosy. The beds were very firm and would not suit everyone. Not Marriott standards by a long way. But then not Marriott prices either.

My Studio apartment in the Cas del Dos

The portable TV was an old fashioned box affair but the biggest problem was that I had to stand on a chair to switch it on/off and change channels and volume. I did ask for a remote at reception but after the desk clerk couldn't find one for the room I was staying in that seemed to be the end of it. Also, the only English speaking channel was Sky news. The few other channels were in Spanish. Generally, most people don't mind not watching TV on holiday, but I think it should at least be easily accessed. Not everyone would be prepared to stand precariously on a chair to watch it. Perhaps that's the idea or the management thought it was "OAP and Child Proof ". If so, they never took into account clever kids or walking sticks.

I have stayed in a number of self catering places over the years and although this was not the worst, I was very disappointed with the cooking provisions. If it was to be rated by the cooking provisions alone, it would be the worst. There was a two hob ring but no oven. There was no kettle or toaster. To make a cup of tea, I had to boil water in the saucepan provided. There was only one other pot and a small frying pan. There were also two small tea cups and one smaller coffee cup. There was a microwave which would have been handy, if I had any microwaveable dishes.

On the plus side, the bath was non-slip and fresh towels were provided every day.

I went to the local shop to buy bread, butter and a few bits and pieces then spent about an hour on the balcony before retiring.

Day 2 Thu 3rd Dec

I set off around 11:30am and went for a walk around the local area. I then went to a bank to exchange some money but forgot my passport. I was told the exchange rate was 1.38 but was only given 1.28 the following day. If I had known the exchange rate was so poor I would have looked for a better deal elsewhere.

The north of Tenerife is unbelievably hilly. Be warned, even if you like walking, if you get lost there are even more hills to climb around every corner. I found out this to my cost and must have walked up and down hills for 5 hours or more. I became a bit concerned when I passed by a car I had admired earlier for the third time. I was lost and exhausted and was now obviously walking in circles. Unfortunately, when I asked for directions, I was given different ones. The main reason being is that Casa del Sol is not well known to the locals of Porto de la Cruz because Casa del sol is on the outskirts in the suburb of San Fernando. The other reason is probably because I stopped in bars and restaurants to ask for directions and felt obliged to have a beer in each establishment.

Anyway, as time continued onwards, I did too, feeling tired but happy. Drink has a way of showing things in a different light. It was now getting dark but I eventually found a restaurant where the waitress was local to the area and knew exactly where my hotel was located. After a bite to eat and another drink or two, I left and successfully found my way to the hotel. I slept well that night.

Day 3 Fri 4th Dec

I was up early. After breakfast I went for a walk, confident that I wouldn't get lost. I changed some sterling to Euros in the bank but was very disappointed with the exchange rate.  No wonder banks make massive profits. Their greed has no bounds.

I returned back to the hotel, successfully navigating the streets without mishap. That would come later.

After several blue label vodkas, a shower and a fresh change of clothes, I wandered into Porto de la Cruz town. I was feeling good and looking forward to my first night on the town.

The Bee Hive, Puerto de la Cruz

I was having a great time in a bar called the Bee Hive, one of the best night spots in Puerto de la Cruz. The barman shown here was getting me another glass for my next refreshment. However, things went badly wrong not long after. I'm not sure if I fell or tripped on my way to the toilet. But whatever happened I must have lost consciousness. I remember vaguely being wheeled in a trolley somewhere and again must have passed out. When I regained consciousness, there were three women and one man around me. I thought to myself "This is not good. Where am I and how did I get here?"

The three women were wearing gloves and facemasks. It was very frightening because I had no idea where I was. They were poking and prodding me and all I could think of was "Why me? Why is this happening?"

I tried to communicate with them but received no reply from the women. Only the man replied. He simply said "relax, relax". I thought to myself, I don't think so at least not until I know where I am and for what reason. I tried to get up but found that I was restrained. Both my arms and legs were tied down. I honestly thought my time on this earth was over. My thoughts were in overdrive wondering what they were going to do with me. Did they want my kidneys for some paying recipient or was it something worse they had in store for me. It felt as if I'd woken up to being a victim in a horror movie. I struggled but to no avail. The only communication I got was from the man and the only word he uttered was "relax". I have no idea how many times he said it but the more he said it, the more I struggled.

I tried to remove what must have been a canular in my right hand and certain that I must have removed it at least once. The women were talking, but in Spanish so I had no idea what they were saying, where I was or what was happening. My struggles increased. The man showed me handcuffs and said that he would use them if I continued struggling.

I stopped for a bit while they poked and prodded and put another needle in. I thought if there is way out of this mess, I need to be as aware as possible. When they left the room, I tried again to get free but all I managed was to bruise both my wrists and legs. 

After I realised there was no way of freeing myself, I thought if I can just reach my phone, then I can call for help. I have no idea how I managed it but I did. I managed to turn my body so that I could get my hand in my pocket to retrieve my phone. I was able to dial 999 and ask the police to assist me.  I told the operator of my situation and that I had no idea where I was but they should be able to locate me using gps.

The police arrived a short time later. It's difficult to describe the relief I felt when they arrived but I tried to keep things in perspective. The mind can play tricks under pressure. Were they genuine? Were they going to take me someplace else? How did they arrive so quickly? These questions and more were going through my head at that time. It was only after they untied me that I could finally relax. It took a number of days before I could actually bear the word "relax". Even now, I still remember the effect that simple word had on me when I was restrained.

Once I was on my feet, the police officers, one male and one female asked where I was staying. After telling them, they were kind enough to take me to a taxi which took me back to the hotel. I was so grateful and relieved to get back in one piece and only a little battered and bruised.

Day 4 Sat 5th Dec

I spent all day in the hotel. When thinking of the previous day, I realised how lucky I was.  Cuts were on both my forehead and underneath my right eye. Another centimetre higher and I could have damaged or lost my eye. As you can probably guess, I was in hospital when I was restrained and it was for my own good. It was to prevent me from falling over again and hurting myself. If I had known this or if English was spoken instead of Spanish, I would have been more compliant and much less concerned.

The experience has given me a better insight and understanding of what can happen when someone has had a bit too much to drink and ends up in accident and emergency. I've now seen and experienced it from both sides of the fence. Prior to this, I would have always taken the side of the hospital staff but now I believe it depends on the circumstances. Those who have never experienced it will obviously have much less understanding and as a result have less empathy with the patient. This happened in my case and was compounded with a difference in language. Although I am grateful for their attention and the work they carried out on my behalf, I remain concerned for their approach to incidents like mine.

Day 5 Sun 6th Dec

X-ray

I went for a walk around San Fernando, had some lunch and returned to the hotel in the late afternoon. Unknown to me, hospital staff had taken an X-ray of my head and upper spine. I only noticed a photocopy of it together with an emergency medical report on the writing desk today. I've no recollection of putting it there but must assume that I did. I surmise that I was given the report when I left hospital. Unfortunately the report is written in Spanish although I did translate it using Google Translate. Although not always accurate, it looks like it could have been translated as "Take two paracetamol twice a day with a glass of beer". That works for me.

Day 6 Mon 7th Dec

I was still feeling sore but went for a walk around Puerto de la Cruz. I bought 2 T-shirts and had a couple of beers and some lunch in one of the local restaurants. I passed by Loro Parque a 13.5 hectare zoo with a huge range of animal and plant life. It is one of the biggest attractions in the Canaries but being on my own I didn't go in. I walked through town and somehow managed to get lost again. I had to turn back and retrace my steps after coming across a dual carriageway. From there it took a few hours to get back to hotel. I arrived back in the early evening, had some dinner and an early night.

Day 7 Tue 8th Dec

Sitio Litre, Tenerife

Today I went to Sitio Litre, the orchid gardens in Tenerife. The entrance fee was only 4.75 Euros and well worth it to see the beautiful flowers and arrangements. Many famous people including Agatha Christie and Alexander von Humbold have visited here. As well as flowers and plants and the oldest and largest dragon trees in Puerto de la Cruz, there were fish ponds with a large number of beautiful koi carp. There was also a small cafe on site where you can get a drink or a snack.

I left Sitio Litre and had a beer in a local restaurant then walked to the town centre in Puerto de la Cruz. I found a nice bar and had another beer then walked along by the beach and took some photos. I walked past a church and took a video of a local band. I then had a beer and a cheese toasty with bacon in a nearby restaurant. I took another video of the passing band and a girl that was playing a recorder outside the restaurant. She was very good so I put a few Euros in her box.

After using the restroom in the restaurant, I discovered that that the waiter had picked up my unfinished beer. I retrieved it, drank it and asked for the bill. I only left a 50 cent tip but told the waiter that it would have been more if he was more observant with the customers. Anyway, he took it all in good nature and seen the funny side of my comments and waved when I left. At least, I think it was a wave.

Shortly after leaving the restaurant, I found a bar off a side street and ordered a beer. After several minutes, I got talking with a couple Andy from Larkhill, Scotland and his wife Maxine from Liverpool. I noticed that they were drinking red wine and I asked if it was any good because I do enjoy the occasional glass of red wine. When they both told me it was really nice, I ordered a glass.

After an interesting conversation with the couple, I ordered another, then another before finally leaving the bar. Each time I ordered a glass of wine I was given some nibbles. Cheese and biscuits are an example. It was a really nice touch and well presented with the wine.

After leaving I went to my usual haunt, an oasis just before the long uphill walk from Puerto de la Cruz to my hotel in San Fernando. I asked if their wine was any good. "Of course it is", the waiter replied. So I ordered one. It was nowhere near as good as the wine in the previous bar and I let the waiter know that and ordered a beer. I still drank the wine of course. I left the bar some time later and made my way back to the hotel. I made dinner in the apartment, checked my email and went to bed.


Day 8 Wed 9th Dec

The pool in the Casa del Sol

I used the pool area for first time today. I took the lift to the 4th floor then went up a flight of stairs to get there. The pool area was very well kept with plenty of sunbeds. The staff that served me beers were very friendly and helpful. The pool was a bit small for regular swimming but ideal for the occasional dip or splash around. There was also a lovely mountain view including a view of the well known Mount Teide, an active volcano with its summit being the highest point in Spain. I relaxed on a sunbed at the pool from 10am until 3pm. It was a very enjoyable experience and a welcome break from the hill climbing in the surrounding area.


Day 9 Thu 10th Dec

I went to the pool this morning again. This time I took the lift to the 5th floor. I've no idea why I didn't notice this before because it was so much easier. Anyway, it was 23 degrees and nice to lie back and relax. I stayed there until 2:30pm then had lunch. I thought there was a lounge bar in the hotel but unfortunately it wasn't open at this time of year. I went to a local restaurant instead. However, I felt a bit out of it since I was the only single person in the restaurant. The others were either couples or groups. I had one beer and then returned to my apartment and listened to some music before going to bed. I don't know who moved in next door but what a racket.

I was in room 201 and next door to the right as you walk towards my room is 202 where a Dutch couple were staying. However, to the left there was a room with no number so I assumed that this room is probably used for staff in the hotel or perhaps a spare room that is used occasionally. But the occupants were very noisy. Through the night a female moaned and groaned but it sounded more like crying than any sexual act and went on until 3am. I was almost tempted to knock the door and see if she was OK but thought that may give the wrong impression of my intentions. It would be even worse if she didn't speak English so I decided that if it continued the next night, I would contact reception.



Day 10 Fri 11th Dec

I went to the pool again today but the water is a bit cold. I left around 3:30pm, made lunch and had a nap. I made egg fried rice but what a disaster. I had no salt left and it tasted awful. Only large bags of salt were available to buy in the local shop so I did without. Something else I've learned when holidaying on my own is to take certain provisions with me in future on any self catering holidays like this.

I checked a website for return transfer details but was too early. This had to be done less than 48 hours before the return flight time.

My intention was to go to The Mansion nightclub but it doesn't open until 11pm. (The hours are 11pm - 6am Fri/Sat). It's about a mile walk but the distance didn't concern me as I've walked a lot further even when not lost. If needed, I could always take a taxi but 11pm was a bit too long to wait and what I didn't want was to go out too early and drink too much. I didn't want another episode of Tenerife's emergency 'hospitality'.

I decided to stay in and read a book. After 2 pages of a riveting read, I changed my mind. I got ready and went out for a beer. I went to a restaurant with live music where a guy was playing a guitar and singing some old numbers. He was terrible and the assault on my ears was painful but I felt obliged to clap anyway. Again, I felt out of it here because I was the only single in the place. There were several couples and a few groups of people in the restaurant that would have enjoyed the upbeat music of this talented musician if he hadn't been drowned out by their conversation. Then again, it gave an ambience to the restaurant that complimented his musical talent.

I managed to drag myself away after only one beer and took a walk further along the road. After only a few dozen steps, I could once more appreciate the sound of silence.  After a few more steps I arrived at the bar where the owner had first given me directions the day that I got lost. It was only a courtesy to visit this establishment once more and have a beer. So I stopped here for a while, had a couple of beers and chatted with the owner. I left some time later, went back to the hotel and went to bed around 12pm. I was too tired go to The Mansion nightclub. Or maybe I was being sensible for once.


Day 11 Sat 12th Dec

I went to the pool again today. It was becoming habit forming but unfortunately the pool bar wasn't open today. I didn't get my customary beers and I left disappointed around 2:30pm. Sometimes we must make sacrifices. To offset this a little, I had a bottle of San Miguel on the balcony with a ham and Edam cheese baguette. With no restaurant in the hotel other than the one catering to those who had bed and breakfast or half or full board stays, I either ate out or rustled up a tasteless meal. Eating out was the best option because although I enjoy cooking, I had neither ingredients nor utensils to make a decent meal.

I opened the second bottle of blue label vodka that looked at me pleadingly from its shelf on the fridge today. Both of us were wondering whether to go out or be sensible and stay in and have few drinks together. I opted to stay in even although it was Saturday. Although I might be on my own in the apartment, at least I can chat to friends on Facebook or read a good book. I'm reading my second book in tandem with the vodka. An early night beckons.


Day 12 Sun 13th Dec

I spent another day at the pool. I had two beers from the pool bar and left at 2:00pm since it was cloudy. I had some lunch with another obligatory beer and followed this with a short nap. When I woke, I got ready and went out at 7pm. I found a quite wine bar in the area and had pleasant glass of red wine before moving on to a pizza restaurant and a couple of cold beers. I then went to what I would probably call my local haunt where I had mixed tapas with cheese and ham together with a few more beers. I chatted with the waitress for a bit and found out more about the area in both San Fernando and Puerto de la Cruz.

I'm not sure what time I left the restaurant, but I slept well


Day 13 Mon 14th Dec

Today was really sunny with not a cloud in the sky. I took advantage of it by spending all day at the pool. I had 4 beers and some lunch from the pool bar and left about 4pm. I then went back to the apartment and took a short nap. I later tried to confirm the transfer details but my WiFi time had expired. I went to reception and found that they had received a fax from the transfer company Urbis earlier today with the transfer details. The pickup time 07:53 Ouch!

In the evening I went out to a local restaurant and ordered a pizza. However, I could only eat one slice but the waitress put the rest of the pizza in a box for me to take away. I left and went back to the hotel and had another early night.


Day 14 Tue 15th Dec

Beer and a baguette for breakfast

I had the usual ham and cheese baguette for breakfast and went to the pool around 10:30am. It was another sunny day with temperatures of at least 26 degrees. I left the pool area about 4:30pm, the longest time that I'd spent there. I had the Pizza from the night before for dinner/late lunch. I then went out to buy cigarettes for my daughter's partner then visited a few restaurants and bars that I had frequented to say my goodbyes. I had met some really nice genuine people in my time here and just wanted to say my farewells to them . After this, I went back to the hotel and packed my case and set the alarm for an early start tomorrow.


Day 15 Wed 16th Dec

I was up early for the transfer to the airport and was picked up at 7:55am. It was a three hour trip to the airport but should have been only two hours at most. I was the first passenger to be picked up but after more than an hour and several pickups later, I was only minutes away from the hotel I was picked up from. This was unfortunate but can happen when there are a number of different pickup points. However, I think that three hours on a bus without toilet facilities is too long without stopping for a break. I returned home safely on seat 13A.